Perpetual Motion

This used to be one of my favorite songs to play on the viola. I miss my music days. I was lucky to play with some wonderfully talented high schoolers – far more talented than I – but I did hold my own as first or second chair in the viola section. I still remember all the notes from this song, and anticipate someday owning a viola again and perhaps even teaching one of my kids the beauty of music.

But perpetual motion has a totally different connotation to me today. I can’t sit still. I have a problem.

I took two days off this week – workload was lighter than usual, and the few projects I had on my plate didn’t impact anyone else, so I took advantage of vacation time to burn. I was going to lounge in front of the TV for a few hours, do some light cleaning, get ready for a great weekend.

I haven’t done any of that. I jumped into a deck for work. I made a few client calls. I wrote a bunch of blog posts. I did some heavy cleaning. I baked apple crisp. I organized some drawers. I did laundry. i changed sheets. I. Didn’t. Stop. Once.

I blame it on a busy life. I’m always on the go out of necessity – day care drop off, work, day care pick up, kids dinner, kids bath, kids bedtime routine, getting stuff ready for the next day, and it goes on and on. The weekends are jammed with fun activities for the kids, cleaning, grocery shopping, dinner prep for the following week, laundry…and it goes on and on too.

There is little time to relax, and the time that does exist quickly disappears when I think “if I just get this cleaning done, I can have more time to do (something fun) with the kids this weekend”. Or “if I get this work done tonight, I can get the laundry done tomorrow night”. Or “if I prep the kids lunch tonight, I can work out in the morning”. It’s never “if I can get this done, I can take a nap tomorrow.”

I’ve tried, I really have. I’m not sure this is an issue I will ever overcome. I wasn’t always like this. There were days of enjoying pedicures, weeks where I found myself on a Caribbean beach enjoying the warm sand and lack of cell phone coverage, long drives with my husband enjoying the mountains, and early days of napping with a drooling baby resting on my chest. I suppose some of what I feel is the stage of life we are in – two kids in preschool, work, and a desire to have as much quality time on the weekends as possible.

Maybe this weekend I’ll make it a point to squeeze in a quick nap myself. I think I’ve earned it.


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2 responses to “Perpetual Motion

  1. Oooh. I feel for you. I’ve been like that before and it is a phase. You’re so used to juggling tasks and working at a frenzied pace. Hang in there and maybe put the pedicure on your to-do list so that you HAVE to get it done.

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